Ranking that Big Box of DVDs and Blu-rays that Phil and Val Gave Me

My friends Val and Phil are trying to clean out their garage to make from for … their car? Who actually parks their car in a garage? Weird.

Amongst their boxes of anime figures and workout equipment, was their giant box of DVDs and Blu-rays. They don’t really watch DVDs anymore with all the streaming and such.

They kept a few DVDs from some of their favorite shows and movies, but gave the rest to me. Huzzah!

So now, I present to you: A RANKING OF PHIL AND VAL’S BIG BOX OF DVDs & BLU-RAYs!

(This is going to take a while to complete. Check back for updates.)

  1. Dogma
    • I never got into the View Askewniverse very much, but I do remember watching Dogma when it first came out way back when. I found it just as funny this time around as I did on the first watch. Sex and platypuses really are proof that God has a sense of humor. Well … and Quantum Mechanics.
  2.  Spaceballs
    • Besides being hilarious, Spaceballs holds a special place in my heart because is was the first VHS cassette tape played in my house when I was a kid. Favorite scene: when President Screw opens up the can of Perri-Air. Also: “KNOCK ON MY DOOR! KNOCK NEXT TIME!”
  3. Blazing Saddles
    • People always say: “You could never make Blazing Saddles today,” and I kinda have to agree with them. But it’s not because they drop the N-Bomb or any of the jokes. At it’s core, Blazing Saddles is a silly movie. At one point, the villain Hedley Lamarr leaves the set, takes a taxi to Mann’s Chinese Theater, and starts watching another movie. Pretty silly. Do not get me wrong: there is nothing wrong with silly. There are some great silly movies. But … I just don’t think people want silly anymore. Everything has to be serious and explosions and alpha-manly and shit. B-O-R-I-N-G. I’ll take a silly Mel Brooks movie over that stuff any day.
  4. American Psycho
    • Up until this point, the most I knew about this movie was that one clip featuring Hip to be Square. I think I would compare this movie to something like Vampire’s Kiss … except good. I think a lot of what really works is Christian Bale’s performance. Despite the giant, brick sized cell phones, I kept forgetting that this movie was set in late 80’s. Is that weird? Also: Totally using “I got to return some videotapes” as my exiting line from now on.
  5. TRON (1982)
    • I have a soft-spot for this movie. I loved it so much as a kid. As an adult, despite the paper-thin plot, I still adore the now hokey effects and cheese 80’s graphics.
  6. Shaun of the Dead
    • I think I’d rank this higher, but we’re kinda at maximum zombie right now. Super Serious Zombie. Which is probably why we probably need Shaun of the Dead more than ever. Still … I just wasn’t feeling that same joy I did when I first watched this movie. I’m blaming Big Zombie for over-saturating the current market.
    • Every time I saw a cell phone, I was like: Were they ever that small?
  7. Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life
    • This is another one of those movies that I’ve bits of, but never the whole thing. Monty Python has always been hit or miss, and this one feels a bit of a miss. The sketches are good, but it just feels like a slog to get through them all.
  8. The Venture Bros. Season 3
    • I really loved Venture Bros. when it first came on. Season 1 and 2 were pretty cool, and the Season 4 final was super cool. But Season 3. Ooof. This was a horrible season. Oh well. Can’t win them all.
  9. TRON Legacy
    • Oh my god. This movie is PAINFUL. It’s basically every tech-bros’ wet dream. In the first 5 minutes, the lead is weaving through traffic on a motorcycle and I hate him. You know a movie is going to be bad when you’re actively rooting against the lead. There’s a Dollar General David Bowie. Daft Punk does not help this movie. Maybe I’ve just heard them too much? I really don’t like the effects in this movie. They just seem kinda average. But maybe it’s because I’m watching it on a TV and this was meant for IMAX? All that said: I do like the break into cubes effect that they do when a program gets derezzed.
    • I think this movie has the opposite problem of the original: it has too much plot. And just turns into a dialog dumping ground.
  10. The Evil Dead
    • Just because something is a classic doesn’t make it good.
  11. Gamer (2009)
    • This movie is tedious. I watched it years ago on cable. The premise isn’t that interesting. Maybe it’s supposed to be a metaphor or something? I don’t know.

Ranking Every Riff in MST3k’s Chicken of Tomorrow

For a while now, I’ve been wanting to do something where I rank random things, like every joke in Airplane!: The Movie, or the quality of ice teas at Buc-ees throughout the state. Originally I had hoped to create a WordPress plug-in to help manage the list, but … well … I’m lazy.

But as they say, we shouldn’t let perfection be the enemy of good, and I decided to just rank something to see if I could.

And so I now present to you: A ranking of every riff from the Mystery Science Theater 3000 Short The Chicken of Tomorrow. This was a pretty easy one to do since the short wasn’t every long, but the DVD I have of it doesn’t have close captioning, which made the transcribing a little tedious. I’ve added notes about some of the jokes in the list. And if you find your favorite riff low in the list … well … even the bad riffs are still pretty good in this one.

And now THE (ranking of the) CHICKEN OF TOMORROW ….

  1. Mike: Eggs are complicated. They should cost $100 each!
    • This is possibly one of favorite MST3k lines. I’ll occasionally say “X is complicated. It should cost $100 each!
  2. Tom: Some eggs don’t even exist.
    • This is another line that I will randomly say.
  3. Crow: There’s no driver … The chickens are taking over!
    • The perfect way to end the short!
  4. Crow: Oh you can’t wait for things to happen, you’ve got to make them happen!
  5. Crow: Yes it’s chicken! Glorious American chicken sliced the American way!
  6. Crow: Yes, chicken sliced to the width of one electron
  7. Tom: But aren’t chickens with good self-esteem equally important?
  8. Tom: Mork calling Orson
    • This is a reference to the TV show Mork and Mindy starring Robin Williams as Mork from Ork. The Orks used egg-shaped spaceships that you had to break out of like a chicken breaking out of an egg. Mork would telepathically contact his boss by repeating the mantra: “Mork calling Orson, come in Orson.”
  9. Tom: Aren’t there suppose to be pantyhose in there?
  10. Tom: The unholy alliance between big oil and big chickens.
  11. Mike: Stop throwing them at my car!
    • Narrator: Here’s a few facts about eggs …
  12. Mike: I’ll have an egg tomorrow, I swear!
  13. Crow: GRADING!
  14. Tom: Or put a warning slip on her desk.
  15. Tom: Eat and Grow forever!
  16. Crow: Oh yea, who hasn’t?
    • Narrator: Have you ever noticed the old hen turning her eggs over in her nest?
  17. Crow: She’s worth millions.
  18. Mike: Miss Moss, and for you Miss Taylor.
  19. Mike: Time to Die …
  20. Mike: 40 piece chicken nuggets to go!
  21. Tom: Hey guys! It’s God!
  22. Mike: She will live.
    • Apparently Eggs / Feed determines life or death.
  23. Mike: Ride the Wild Mouse!
  24. Mike: I’d like to be the Chicken of Tomorrow, but how can I be more the Man of Today?
  25. Mike: Wait a minute: Men and women breeding better poultry? What kinda sick experiment is going on here?
  26. Crow: Oh pardon me.
    • This line isn’t that funny, but I love the voice Crow does for it.
  27. Tom: OOOOOOOOOOO!
  28. Crow: I’ve seen the episode where the eggs come to fast and she starts putting them in her mouth.
  29. Mike: I hate it when people tape their own deliveries.
  30. Mike: It’s Goofus and Gallant.
  31. Mike: Life is grand! It stretches out in front of me like an eternity!
  32. Crow: Garage sale … Goodwill … save for the kids …
  33. Mike: That guys is escaping disgusted as a chicken!
  34. *Crow miming eating chicks*
    • I’ve seen this short at least a billion times, but this is the first time I noticed Crow miming eating the chicks on screen. Hilarious.
  35. Tom: Yeah, they own everything.
    • Narrator: You know how chickens are …
  36. Tom: Joey the Cockstone Tortellie, Ricky the Davantello, Jimmy Crazy Cock Cochinee (probably not transcribed right)
    • Honestly, this joke should be higher on the ranking, but I think I was a little bitter having to listen to the same section a billion times over to get the names and the DVD not having Closed Captioning.
  37. Tom: Everybody, Soylent Green is made from Chickens!
    • This is a reference to the last scene in the movie Soylent Green. Futurama has made several hilarious references to Soylent Green as well.
  38. Mike: There’s no point – it’s just funny!
  39. Crow: These are your chickens on drugs.
    • This is, of course, making fun of the 80’s PSA. Who knew eggs were a gateway drug?
  40. Mike: So put your mouth under a chicken.
  41. Crow: Lick your eggs, or have a friend lick them.
  42. Mike: So you can see why egg farming is so fascinating.
  43. Mike: Full of Salmonella Tom: *Smacking noises*
    • Salmonella is an infection that you can get from some animals and pets.
  44. Mike: These chickens were smoking in bed.
    • Apparently smoking cigarettes in bed used to be really common. Sounds kind of disgusting to me.
  45. Crow: May I have a piece of my own white meat please?
  46. Tom: Oh thanks for the generous helping … jezze
  47. Tom: These must be models portions here …
  48. Mike: We bring you now to market
  49. Mike: That’s an urban myth!
  50. Tom: Heavens I’m so fat! I just look at chicken feed and I gain weight!
  51. Crow: The chicken shortage of 1937
    • While Google AI enthusiastically states there was a chicken shortage in 1937, I can’t find any hard evidence.
  52. Tom: You could carry it in your wallet.
  53. Mike: There concerts at the gazebo.
  54. Mike: Alright come on sing – row row row – you’re not singing!
  55. Crow: The dressing plant? Sound like fun! Tom: I want a new hat!
  56. Crow: *Snoring sounds* Tom: Buddy … wake up!
  57. Mike: Did America really need to be sold on the automotive industry at this point?
  58. Tom: Betty, must you sit in dinner?
  59. Tom: Fellow poultry men our cherished freedoms are threatened from all sides!
  60. Crow: I don’t think I got what it takes to be the chicken on tomorrow.
  61. Mike: If you’re nice we’ll hook you up to the milking machine.
  62. Mike: Some eggs are sent to solitary.
  63. Mike: It’s nice. You know it’s small but the walls are neutral
  64. Tom: Oh hi Cindy! I’m so glad I’m in your group. This is going to be fun!
  65. Crow: Why am I watching this?
  66. Crow: The Bill Clinton Story!
    • In case you forgot, Bill Clinton was a president. He had some high points, but also some low points.
  67. Tom: The Chicken of Tomorrow in a deadly battle against the Chicken of Today!
  68. Crow: CHICKENS!
  69. Tom: No it isn’t.
    • Really, it isn’t.
  70. Crow: Individual counseling is provided.
  71. Corw: Woo Hoo! We’re going on a trip! Hey, where are we going?
  72. Mike: I think the fella in white really likes us Susan.
  73. Mike: Or migrant workers.
    • How many chickens can fit in a coop?
  74. All: Rodents? AAAAAHHHHH!
  75. Mike: I’m in the incubator now.
  76. Mike: A collections ciders and spring water should be kept on hand.
  77. Crow: Normandy!
  78. Crow: How dry I am? *hickup*
  79. Mike: Or chickens typically.
    • It can hold thousands of guest!
  80. Tom: Sticks of dynamite are arranged carefully around the parameter.
  81. Crow: Make sure to put them all in one basket.
  82. Tom: Hey pal – feed me then clean up my poops!
  83. Crow: Dad went a little nuts this Easter.
  84. Mike: They’re all wearing Rembrandt Hats.
  85. Tom: Broadway!
    • Where everyone is going after incubation.
  86. Mike: Uh … dad … if you could carve a little faster … I’m kinda hungry …
  87. Mike: Cigarette butts, hair, beer cans …
  88. Tom: Such as here at Sotherby’s.
  89. Crow: Which seems excessively anal retentive.
  90. Mike: Even to the Texaco Station!
    • This joke is kinda stupid, but I like the voice Mike makes for it.
  91. Tom: You think I can wear these pants out tonight?
  92. Tom: You know this kinda music helps chickens breed. It’s kinda the Luther Vandross of chicken music.
  93. Crow: This could be your drumstick, this is the number to call.
  94. Mike: Oh this is going to be hot hot hot.
  95. Tom: Alternatively they may bring their eggs early the day of the auction.
  96. Tom: Yeah for pervs.
    • The only appropriate place for a “Chick Inspector” t-shirt.
  97. All: AAAH! Tom: Jezze!
    • Suddenly it’s Carnival of Souls here! (I’m pretty sure that line is from another MST3k, but I can’t remember which one …)
  98. Tom: eh … they mingle … get to know each other.
  99. Tom and Crow: *Chicken Noises*
    • A great way to end this movie!
  100. Mike: How many are you sitting on?
  101. Crow: I said speed is essential!
  102. Crow: Except for the sports section!
  103. Crow: Dedicated to the chickens that lost their life in the Great Chicken War.
  104. Tom: And if they’ve completed their lessons.
  105. Tom: There it is, wait … no … There!
    • Where’s Waldo?
  106. Mike: The chickens are dining in front of a Susan Rothstein mural.
    • Who is Susan Rothstein?? Can’t find a painter by that name.
  107. Mike: Rooms by the hour!
  108. Tom: Chickens are shipped to the set of Oklahoma.
  109. Crow: There’s your appetizers, I’ll be back to get your drink orders ladies.
  110. Tom: Put your hand up Mike: *Put’s hand up*
  111. Mike: Come on that tickles!
  112. Tom: That’s one bloodshot eye.
  113. Tom: Thank you young man!
    • Narrator: Good Chicks come Good Eggs. I love the granny voice Tom does for this line.
  114. Mike: Can I go to the bathroom? Tom: No, stay in there! Mike: Oh can I go home? Tom: No the door’s locked.
  115. Crow: Hey, clean your fingers!
  116. Tom: And one bathroom for all of them.
  117. Mike: For a few weeks only to be eaten.
  118. Crow: Oh wait, that’s my Silly Putty.
  119. Crow: Come on down and eat everybody!
  120. Mike: Design by Frank Loyd Wright.
    • I don’t know … they don’t look complicated and impractical enough.
  121. Tom: Hey! Why are we screeching?
  122. Crow: Open your hymnals to number 325 …
  123. Tom: These are headed for the driving range.
  124. Tom: Hey hey hey, Fat Albert!
    • Fat Albert was a cartoon character from the 80’s.
  125. Mike: You’re adorable!
    • Thank you, young man!
  126. Tom: To be killed … to be killed … to be killed.
  127. Crow: By removing meal worms.
    • How can you improve chicken?
  128. Crow: Hey, I’m trying to sleep in here!
  129. Mike: Say, can I have a bigger egg?
  130. Crow: What did I do last night?
  131. Crow: Woah! Milton Berle there!
  132. Crow: eww … I got a tiny headache.
  133. Tom: The one with the rats.
  134. All: What?
  135. Tom: Yeah go have a little fun.
  136. Mike: Unless filthy Fred there collects them.
  137. Crow: Pullets!
  138. Tom: Right … you push it out. Geesh … this is hard …
  139. Crow: Great … what are those?
  140. Crow: Does this taste funny to you?
  141. Tom: Yeah I’m cool baby!
  142. Mike: Yeah right. Backwards-Jackass Company.
    • Hey! I resemble that remark!
  143. Tom: Ah … he’s drunk!
  144. Mike: Then they turn on each other.
  145. Mike: Oh … I’l be out in a … minute…
  146. Mike: If you kinda squint.
  147. Tom: Oh, it’s true!
    • 100 degree eggs!
  148. Crow: And you know what that means!
  149. Mike: Like wagons!
  150. Tom: Uh … that ones clean …
  151. Crow: Get in there!
  152. Tom: Help me.
  153. Crow: Go … Go …
  154. Crow: And this fellow!
  155. Tom: It’s Ross Perot!
    • In case you don’t remember, Ross Perot was a presidential candidate.
  156. Tom: You bet!
  157. Tom: I’m full!
  158. Crow: Here I come!
  159. Tom: *giberish*

Honorable Mentions

There’s one point in the short where the narrator claims that egg laying should be easy. The film cuts to a chicken in a nest with a voice-over done in the style of a 50’s movie femme fatale: That’s what you think big boy! Mike and the bots are shocked and wowed by this, with – I think – Tom commenting “That was weird!”

Audio with Fedora 40 and KDE Plasma

In trying to get my microphone to work in Fedora 40 with KDE Plasma, I somehow broke audio playback. Plasma would play it’s startup sound, but then after that, the speaker icon would have a red cross through it like it was muted. Plugging in headphones would unmute, and I could hear the “bonk” sound if I tried to increase or decrease the volume. But soon as I tried to play something, the speaker icon would go back to having the rad cross through it. Checking the setting panel … if I was there when I plugged in the headphone, I would get the regular setting, but if I played a test sound, I would get the error “Error trying to play a test sound. The system said: “Invalid state””. If I went to the setting after I tried to play a sound in another app, I only get the mic setting but no speaker or output setting.

After looking around and trying some different things, I found the answer here: https://discussion.fedoraproject.org/t/upgrade-to-37-no-sound/80888:

dnf remove pulseaudio 
dnf install pulseaudio plasma-pa 
dnf install pipewire-pulseaudio alsa-plugins-pulseaudio --allowerasing

Apparently there is a conflict with one of the packages. Both the microphone and the Speakers seem to be working … for the moment …

Linux is great and works well, till it doesn’t 😛

“What hath God wrought?” : Welcome to Mastodon

What did I do a few Sundays ago? Oh, nothing much. Just stand up the Libranigains Mastodon Server. Well, I cheated a little. I could have done it all from scratch – get a VPS somewhere, setup a server, install the whatzits, etc etc … – but I just used a hosting service – https://masto.host/. Currently, Libranigans is closed to new users. I’ve asked a few of my fellow librarian friends to try it out, but right I’m the only one posting to it.

You’ve probably heard a lot about Mastodon lately W/R/T a replacement for Twitter. And yeah, I guess that’s what it is. But it’s a lot more than that. Really, it’s a different way of thinking about how we organize social media. In a lot of ways, it reminds me of the jump from online services like America Online and Compuserve to the World Wide Web. Instead of data sitting in a proprietary jail like Facebook or Twitter, you can choose which Mastodon server your data calls home. Or you can standup your own Mastodon server. I would liken this a bit to the options you have with serving a web site: For the average user, you’d probably use a hosting service that takes care of the heavy lifting for you. For a more advance user or a larger website, you might choose to standup your own server. Same thing with Mastodon. For most users, you’d probably stick to an established server, like Mastodon.social or mstdn.social but maybe you want your data on your server for reasons, or maybe you’re with a large organization or maybe there’s just a group of like-minded people you want to share cat photos with – standup your own server or use a hosting service.

Users can interact and share information between servers. For example, I can “Boost” (the Mastodon term for “retweeting”) someones post from another server, and someone from elsewhere can boost my post on their home server.

For the most part, interaction between servers is open. Users can set limits on how their data is shared and exposed to the greater world. System administrators can set limits on which servers can interact with theirs. For example, if there’s a server that host a lot of spambots, they may ban those servers from interacting with theirs. Servers can vary in their acceptable use. For example, one server might say: absolutely no nude photos on our server. Another server might say: only if it’s art. And yet another might say: there’s no limit. Mastodon itself is part of the larger Fedivrse – a group of interlinked, decentralized, services.

I have honestly forgotten how much I missed having a Twitter-like service. I had quit Twitter long before quitting Twitter was cool. I probably stayed longer that I should because I enjoyed virtually hanging with the likes of Brendan Maclean and Cecil Baldwin. The last few weeks have been exciting finding new people to follow and talk to.

I think there are still a lot of questions to be answered … but I’m excited to be exploring this new space!

Giving Up

I’ve really been struggling with my Fedora/NVIDIA setup. Not to long ago, I swapped over to the KDE Plasma spin of Fedora, and everything has been fine EXCEPT Cities: Skylines absolutely refuses to run on the NVIDIA card. Other games seem to do fine: the Intel UHD GPU will hand off more complex stuff off to the NVIDIA card. But for some reason, it just won’t hand off anything to the NVIDIA GPU. I tried a number of things … among them trying to launch Cities with switcherooctl and using the -adapter flag when launching Cities.

Instead of trying to spend more time figuring out what’s wrong, I decided to just set the primary GPU to the NVIDIA card using the directions here: https://docs.fedoraproject.org/en-US/quick-docs/how-to-set-nvidia-as-primary-gpu-on-optimus-based-laptops/

And it worked! Cities: Skylines is now running on the NVIDIA GPU … because it has too! Still not as beautiful as is looked under Windows, but a lot better than runing on the Intel GPU.

It kinda sucks, because having the NVIDIA card set to the primary GPU drains the battery and heats up the laptop, but since I rarely use my laptop off the AC Adapter, I guess it doesn’t really matter. Since it looks like this only works in an X11, I guess if I need to save power, I can login to a Wayland session. Or maybe manually set the NVIDIA card to a lower state.

Goodbye Bear Ball

Reminder:

Steal a rugby ball and write your name on it, you’re a common thief.

Steal a rugby ball and put your team name on it, and you’re part of the Texas Rugby Union Ball Exchange Program.

Also: Don’t bring anything you care about to a 7’s tournament.

Bon Voyage Bristol Bears Rugby Ball!

Recycled

I can’t remember if Recycled was the first or second CD in the Best of Billy Volume 2. 6 songs, 2 covers of each, with a Weird Al parody thrown in for good measure.

  1. American Pie – Don McLean
  2. In Between Days – Cover by Silver Scooter
  3. Ordinary World – Cover by Aurora
  4. Creep – Cover by Richard Cheese
  5. Where is My Mind – Cover by Ghost Hook
  6. Video Killed the Radio Star – Cover by the Pillows
  7. American Pie – Cover by Madonna
  8. In Between Days – Cover by Ben Folds
  9. Ordinary World – Cover by FenixTX
  10. Creep – Cover by The Pretenders
  11. Where is My Mind – Cover by Toadies
  12. Video Killed the Radio Star – Cover by the Presidents of the United States of America
  13. American Pie – Cover by Catch 22
  14. In Between Days – The Cure
  15. Ordinary World – Duran Duran
  16. Creep – Radiohead
  17. Where is My Mind – The Pixies
  18. Video Killed the Radio Star – The Buggles
  19. The Saga Begins – “Weird Al” Yankovic

Birthday!

I’m not quite sure what volume of The Best of Billy this is … 5? I made this after a friend’s birthday down on Rainey Street on Austin. Here it is:

  1. Happy Birthday (Titus Jones Remix) – Leslie Hall
  2. Drugs In My Body – Thieves Like Us
  3. On The Door (feat. Amanda Palmer) – Brendan Maclean & Amanda Palmer
  4. Dance To Our Disco – Punks Jump Up
  5. Groove Is In The Girls – Dunproofin’
  6. Just Dance (feat. Colby O’Donis) – Lady Gaga
  7. Hugs Not Drugs (Or Both) – Brendan Maclean
  8. At the Stars – Better Than Ezra
  9. Dancing in the Piglight – Pujol
  10. Daylight Outro (Remix) – Matt and Kim

I’m not expecting to grow flowers in a desert …

I’ve been having good luck with my Bird of Paradise plant and decided to try planting some other bulb plants. I know: strictly speaking a Bird of Paradise plant is not a bulb plant, but close enough. I planted a number of ornamental bulbs, but I also planted some onions and garlic, and out of all of them, they are coming up great!
An onion bloom
I’ve never actually seen an onion bloom. It’s kinda cool. And it’s already attracting visitors …
An onion bloom with a butterfly on it
And one more picture … a little stink bug on a new Bird of Paradise shoot.
A stink bug on a leaf