My friends Val and Phil are trying to clean out their garage to make from for … their car? Who actually parks their car in a garage? Weird.
Amongst their boxes of anime figures and workout equipment, was their giant box of DVDs and Blu-rays. They don’t really watch DVDs anymore with all the streaming and such.
They kept a few DVDs from some of their favorite shows and movies, but gave the rest to me. Huzzah!
So now, I present to you: A RANKING OF PHIL AND VAL’S BIG BOX OF DVDs & BLU-RAYs!
(This is going to take a while to complete. Check back for updates.)
- Dogma
- I never got into the View Askewniverse very much, but I do remember watching Dogma when it first came out way back when. I found it just as funny this time around as I did on the first watch. Sex and platypuses really are proof that God has a sense of humor. Well … and Quantum Mechanics.
- Spaceballs
- Besides being hilarious, Spaceballs holds a special place in my heart because is was the first VHS cassette tape played in my house when I was a kid. Favorite scene: when President Screw opens up the can of Perri-Air. Also: “KNOCK ON MY DOOR! KNOCK NEXT TIME!”
- Blazing Saddles
- People always say: “You could never make Blazing Saddles today,” and I kinda have to agree with them. But it’s not because they drop the N-Bomb or any of the jokes. At it’s core, Blazing Saddles is a silly movie. At one point, the villain Hedley Lamarr leaves the set, takes a taxi to Mann’s Chinese Theater, and starts watching another movie. Pretty silly. Do not get me wrong: there is nothing wrong with silly. There are some great silly movies. But … I just don’t think people want silly anymore. Everything has to be serious and explosions and alpha-manly and shit. B-O-R-I-N-G. I’ll take a silly Mel Brooks movie over that stuff any day.
- American Psycho
- Up until this point, the most I knew about this movie was that one clip featuring Hip to be Square. I think I would compare this movie to something like Vampire’s Kiss … except good. I think a lot of what really works is Christian Bale’s performance. Despite the giant, brick sized cell phones, I kept forgetting that this movie was set in late 80’s. Is that weird? Also: Totally using “I got to return some videotapes” as my exiting line from now on.
- TRON (1982)
- I have a soft-spot for this movie. I loved it so much as a kid. As an adult, despite the paper-thin plot, I still adore the now hokey effects and cheese 80’s graphics.
- The Venture Bros. Season 3
- I really loved Venture Bros. when it first came on. Season 1 and 2 were pretty cool, and the Season 4 final was super cool. But Season 3. Ooof. This was a horrible season. Oh well. Can’t win them all.
- TRON Legacy
- Oh my god. This movie is PAINFUL. It’s basically every tech-bros’ wet dream. In the first 5 minutes, the lead is weaving through traffic on a motorcycle and I hate him. You know a movie is going to be bad when you’re actively rooting against the lead. There’s a Dollar General David Bowie. Daft Punk does not help this movie. Maybe I’ve just heard them too much? I really don’t like the effects in this movie. They just seem kinda average. But maybe it’s because I’m watching it on a TV and this was meant for IMAX? All that said: I do like the break into cubes effect that they do when a program gets derezzed.
- I think this movie has the opposite problem of the original: it has too much plot. And just turns into a dialog dumping ground.
- The Evil Dead
- Just because something is a classic doesn’t make it good.
- Gamer (2009)
- This movie is tedious. I watched it years ago on cable. The premise isn’t that interesting. Maybe it’s supposed to be a metaphor or something? I don’t know.